Saturday, April 26, 2008

of anger and calming oneself

I got really angry ealier. The anger that I want to kick something just to ease it. This just made me even more frustrated for I can't show my feelings here. Not here. Not in the house. Everyone would just get in the way of me calming myself.

Well, of the reason...I was forced to do something i really dont want to do. Something that they think was a real treat. Then, it went okay enough for me not to look back and feel embarrassed or ashamed of myself. Then, when we got home, one of my companions (the one who forced me) started making remarks about how I acted...that I should this and should that....damn! I was doing you a favor! Cant you keep you mouth shut?

All the time that that person was talking and bragging about the thing, i was here, in front of the PC, turning up the volume of the headset until it was so loud I can feel my eardrums throbbing in pain. Still, I can hear everything...

Then, my parents arrived...and the person started telling them about what happened and I got really impatient for all the questions I was asked. i tried to answer as okay as I could, though. So that they cant tell that I am angry already.

Of calming down, I started to breathe like I just run a marathon...yeah, it works for me. I dont know..yeah, I am weird. hehe. Then I vented my feelings on researching something I really really need...it's how to skip my appointment with the dentist later..no, it's true. mom said it would be the first thing this saturday. And it is the wee hours of saturday. I guess I really can't avoid it.

After about 2 minutes of this, I found out that I already calmed down. i am not angry anymore..just resentful and somewhat hopeful that I would not be in the same situation ever again.

Wow, I think I can work in an anger management org or somthing. hehe.Ü

- - - - - >>>>

oh, and of the pictures of my cleaning, I'll post them as soon as I can. I am being anti-downloading at the mo'..haha..

No comments: